Never. EVER. Every fly through Atlanta. Especially in the spring. Or the winter. Or really any time of year. Because if you do, this is what will happen.

You will get on your flight on time and head towards your connecting flight in Atlanta. When you are approximately 40 minutes from Atlanta, a ginormous spring storm will materialize, preventing all flights from arriving or departing. For a while, you will circle the air over Alabama, waiting to see if the storms will clear and you can land. But then the pilot realizes the plane is nearly out of fuel, so you are forced to land in a puny airport in Alabama. You sit on the runway, trapped in the airplane, without food, drink, or air. The pilot is considerate enough to make periodic announcements that he doesn't know what's happening. After nearly 3 hours, the storm clears and you're on your way to Atlanta, (though it takes ages to land and then deplane since the control tower was struck by lightening). Once you land, you are told the wrong gate to go to for your connecting flight, get lost in the freakishly huge Atlanta airport and end up going through security again, sprint to your gate at the cost of destroying your shins, and deal with several UNhelpful airport employees (including one who tells you there's no way you're going to make your flight). Thankfully, your luck takes a turn for the better, and after 3 wrong terminals, you find that your plane hasn't left yet! and you schlep onto the plane.

Yesterday was The Worst Flight of my Life.

But it's nice to be home. And I've been cooking all day. And my bridesmaid's dress is actually pretty great. Hurrah.