oh how things change

Exactly one week ago, if you had asked me my summer plans, I would have told you that they involved spending an extended time in Kyrgyzstan (the small central Asian country just west of China), speaking Russian and hanging out with Kyrgyz peeps while Trav did his internship. Alas, due to 1 very stubborn UVU bureaucrat (and the slightly unstable political situation in Kyrgyzstan- they just had a coup a few weeks ago), his application for approval from UVU was denied, leaving him without an internship and us without plans for most of the summer.

My, how quickly thing can change.

So now what do we do for the next 3 months?

the new girl

With a ring in her very straight and well-shaped nose and her long, straight, black hair, she reminds me of a gypsy. She defies the world with her body language and smoldering gaze (in an angry not seductive way). And as of today she's my newest student.

I've seen her around campus a few times and always given her a wide berth. You don't want to get in the way of that kind of attitude! Today our conversations went something like this:

Me: Welcome to class. What's your name?
her: (mumbles as she glares at me)
Me: One more time, please?
her: ****! (her name, not a curse word. but it kind of sounds like one)
Me: Here's your syllabus. Please read it (as I flee back to my table)
after class:
her: Is it always going to be like that?
me: Like what? About Native American tribes?
her: (nods sharply, says nothing, arms folded defiantly)
me: No, just some days. So if you're bored by Indians, don't worry. We'll do other things.
her: (nods again)
me: (thinking I detect a glimmer of a smile, I smile back. What little smile there may have been suddenly disappears, and she stalks out of class).

Suffice it to say, this girl is far from warm and fuzzy. And even if she's not as bad as she seems upon first impression, she's still a bit...intimidating. I'm hoping we can bond over her being Middle Eastern and me loving everything about Arabs, but I'm skeptical. We'll see how things develop.

glorious sleep

I had a 5 day reprieve from school last week. Our original plans involved driving to some exotic location and lounging on the beach, but due to other possible future travel developments and the need to save our pennies, we opted to stay home. It was actually quite pleasant; we did a whole lot a nothin'. Most of our time was spent reading, lounging, watching movies (I recommend Goodbye Lenin and Bulletproof Monk-it really is as awesome as it sounds), interspersed with eating and a bit of gardening.

Oh, and sleeping, did I mention that? I discovered that when I have no reason to get up, my body will naturally wake itself up after exactly 7 hours and 50 minutes of sleep. At first I thought it was just because of the sun shining in my window, but then the sun went away for 3 days and I still woke up right on schedule. And I felt absolutely great. I guess I hadn't noticed how tired I had been getting from skipping sleep. Who knew your body actually does need 8 hours!

Alas, after such a great discovery, I'm back in school, and with it comes fewer and fewer restful hours during the night. I suppose that gives me one reason to be grateful my church doesn't start until 1:00- at least I'll have Sundays.

a lesson on Muslim headscarves

If you've ever wondered the difference between a burka, hijab, and chador (or wondered what they are in general), check out this article from the bbc. It's about a law passed in Belgium that bans women from wearing a burka, but if you scroll down about halfway, there's a lovely set of pictures with accompanying explanation about headscarves.

Last week my eye doctor thought I might possibly have a brain tumor or MS or optic neuritis or something else dreadful. So for a week and a half I did too. After tears and hysteria followed by extreme anxiety, I settled into a nice indifferent sort of mood. After all, I rationalized, it couldn't possibly be me who has something horrible like MS, right? Other people get that. Not me. I'd rather have a brain tumor. So then I had an mri and waited for the results (and waited and waited and nearly blew up at the most idiotic, unhelpful morons at the radiologist's office)...

...and finally found out that my brain is free and clear of anything nasty.

Disaster averted, for now. Hopefully the spots I'm seeing in my right eye will disappear within the next month or so, leaving me only with an unpleasant memory and high bills.

faith

I've been thinking a lot about faith lately. My patriarchal blessing says that I have been blessed with great faith. And as a child and teenager, that was easy to believe, especially since nothing bad every really happened to me. Oh, I had my "trials" just like everyone else, but nothing that really challenged my beliefs. But I've started wondering how to have faith but also have your heart aligned with God's will.

For example, If I were to develop a terrible disease, I'm totally, 100% sure that if God wanted it, I could be cured. No problem. But does He want to? What if it's His will that I suffer? What if there's "something I'm supposed to learn" from said ailment? All the faith in the world won't change God's will....or could it? If I had stronger faith, would I be healed, even if it's not part of God's plan for me?

So how do I know what God wants for me? How do I pray the "right" way and ask only for those things which God wants for my life? What if my faith is great, but not placed in the right area? Is my my faith then in vain, and I end up a bitter, dying old woman? Or must I accept that whatever God does is the best thing...

...but then, does God have an active hand in everything that happens to us? Do some things just happen because they happen and God just observes? Are these things really planned out for us?

I have so many questions.

some thoughts/worries

1- I'm looking for the perfect shade flowers to plant around my house. Perennials would be nice, but not mandatory. Any suggestions?

2- Sunday morning I woke up to whitish spots in my right eye. I immediately assumed I was going blind (my greatest fear since I first got glasses at the age of 7), and rushed to the doctor Monday afternoon. Since then, I've gone to 2 eye doctors and 1 retina specialist. I had my eye poked, prodded (literally) and puffed with air, dilated twice, and several color photographs and scans done (which I'm sure cost a fortune...I can't wait to see the bill for all this). And after all that, they still don't know what's wrong with me. It could be nothing. Or it could be something terrible, but the doctor refuses to tell me lest I start needlessly worrying and assuming the worst. Which I'm already doing, of course.

3- I've decided I need to get rid of/stop wearing all of my flowy shirts. I've had 2 students ask me if I'm pregnant in the past week. Once I show them my non-pregnant stomach, they're convinced, but really. It's getting a little old. And then another student asked if something was wrong with me because I'm pink instead of white or brown (and I wasn't blushing). What can I say, I was blessed with a ruddy complexion.

4- Three more weeks til the end of the semester. I'm going to be very sad to leave these students behind. Aside from some dear but rather...demanding level 2 students (who would learn a lot faster if they actually listened for a few minutes) these 2 classes have been some of my best. They've definitely made up for the beasts from last fall.

5- I miss blogging.

Dear weather,

Please stop fooling around with winter. I'm sick of swirling bits of snow that don't really stick and dry, dead grass and trees. Also. I would like to remind you that I do not live in Seattle, and therefore the sun should come out more than once a week. Please go find spring. I'm sure you can entice her to stay.

Sincerely,
a whiny, vitamin-D deprived winter-blues sufferer

Happy St.Patrick's day!

Trav always makes fun of me for this, but I consider myself Irish (Irish-American, I should say) above all other nationalities. In reality, I'm not really any more Irish than I am German or Danish or English. But I identify more with the Irish side of the family. Maybe it's because I've done lots of research on my Irish family history. Or because my first name is Irish. Or because my middle name is from my off-the-boat Irish great-grandmother. Or because they speak/spoke a really fantastic form of Gaelic (which I tried to teach myself in high school). Or maybe because I do Irish dance. Whenever I mention it, people ask me if I dance because I'm Irish. I don't really (there are far more non-Irish Irish dancers than Irish...but there is a ton of red-headed Irish dancers...); I do Irish dance because it's awesome. It's just convenient that I happen to be part Irish.

Whatever my personal motivation may be, there are dozens of reasons to be proud to be Irish. Here's a short list:

• to speak Irish Gaelic
• to speak Irish Engligh
• to be so feisty! How many other countries are renowned for having such fiery tempers?
• to be green! Sometimes when I see pictures of Ireland, I'm homesick for the land I've never been to
  
• to have great fiddle music
  
• to eat soda bread
• to have produced James Joyce
• to believe in leprechauns
  
• to have done a large chunk of the dirty work in American cities during the early 1900s
• to have a long, rich, fascinating history
• to dance with flying feet

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

for the love of dirt!

I started a compost pile. And I love it. I love that I can throw food out my screen door into the pile of decomposing food (this is especially enjoyable when throwing eggs that cracked when I accidentally flung them to the ground in their shopping bag). That my leaves went to good use this year. That I feel earthy and wholesome piling up my vegetable waste while I'm preparing for dinner. That I might possibly have nice soil for my hopefully organic garden this summer. That my garbage doesn't stink any more and is only half as full these days (the recylcing has probably had something to do with this, too).

I did, however, make one fatal mistake. I put this compost pile in one of the worst places in my yard. It's close to the house, yes, but it's in almost constant shade. That pile hasn't felt any sun in months! And because of this, I fear my compost won't be ready in time for spring planting. I also suspect that I need to turn my compost pile more than once in a while. And I don't really have any soil in my compost mixture, and I'm pretty sure that's one of the key ingredients.

Now that I think about it, there are probably dozens of things I haven't done to make my compost perf. And I have no idea what they might be. But luckily, the Central Utah Gardens have a class in a few weeks all about compost. It's free, I'm going, and I'm ridiculously, nerdily excited about it. I've had a vegetable garden the past 5 years, and it has been quite successful. But I haven't delved into organic gardening or composting or producing herbs that I actually cook with more than twice a year (if you need any sage, or rather cups upon cups upon cups of sage, head down to my old house. Two winters still haven't killed that stuff off yet). I'm hoping this year I can learn all sorts of useful things and end up with produce coming out my ears.

If you happen to still live somewhere near Utah county, you can sign up for this class (or others) here.