Last year, at my first semester of teaching ESL at UVU, I encountered a serious problem. I was young (and very young looking), blond, female, freshly graduated with an MA, terrified to teach a group larger than 3 students, and, to my dismay, 65% of my students were Korean. You may be wondering why this is a problem. Let me explain.
Koreans, more so than any culture of which I am aware, are extremely concerned with age. Concerned to the point where they have particular ways to conjugate verbs and special terms of address for people based on how much older or younger they are than you. If you are older, you say hello one way; if you are younger, you use a different word. Similarly, if you are older, you get respect; if you are younger, you don't (at least not as much).
So there I was, facing the demanding "How old are you" from my Korean students every day, all the while trying to decide what to do. Every time I refused to answer, I was thrown into a fit of blushing (I don't know why). I knew they didn't respect me; indeed, it was hard to miss when they spent their time ignoring me, asking off topic, irrelevant questions, demanding this and that from me as their teacher...and I could go on. I also knew that all of my Korean students were younger than 24. I decided that it would be much better for me, especially considering the fact that being a woman would already count against me, if I were older than all of my students.
So I lied.
I finally told my students I was 25, when I was really only 24. And voilà, they started being much more respectful. I don't know if that was the only reason. I'm pretty sure I was a nervous, confusing wreck for the first few weeks of school. And when my birthday passed in November and they threw a party for me, I turned 26. All summer I've been 26, and word has gotten around to the point where my new students usually already know my age before I even meet them.
Alas, all of this was undone today in a moment of pure stupidity! I left my wallet sitting on the table next to me while I was tutoring today. One of the students I was tutoring saw it laying there and wanted to see my pictures (Koreans are obsessed with pictures). After much begging and pleading, I finally relented and chose one of the less terrible fotos (wherein, I was informed, I look "more fatter" than I do now): my NY license...which happens to have my birth date in plain view and which OF COURSE was noticed by this student!
So now he knows, and although I explained why I did it, and vehemently insisted that he not share this information with any other students, my secret is out.
Blast.
*By the way, I have since grown to love my Korean students and their ridiculous ideas about age. I'm rather obsessed with it myself, so it pretty much works out.
9 comments:
Ha ha, oh dear, what a predicament!
Oh what a tangled web we weave, when first we practice to deceive.
But Oh how vastly we improve our style, when we practice all the while.
Ha ha. I totally feel for you. I look very young too. Hopefully you didn't loose too much respect.
Going back a post...I tried to hold on to my California license for as long as possible. I bypassed the Utah DMV, but had to get a new one here in Arizona with "Hill". Boo.
P.S. I've decided I'm going to South Africa with Brian in November. You guys should think about coming...
he he he...so young, so naive..just kidding, nothing like getting caught in a lie, it's the worst
Hey I just noticed that our photography site is one of your favorite things list. I take back any sarcastic remarks I made! I appreciate the props (and your fine behind, I thought that alone might ruin our friendship)!
it doesn't help that you look 15 still ;) I don't know how your students believed you!!! :P
oh dear.
at least you didn't add 5 or 10 years to your age. 1 year is pretty easy to forgive.
Once when I was pregnant with Noelle and was 25 years old I worked at a garden center. I didn't wear my wedding ring, so I wouldn't lose it in the dirt. on more than one occasion, little old ladies (and some not so old men) guessed that I was 17 years old. Yup, they thought I was an un-wed, pregnant teenager. I have no idea what people who didn't bother to talk to me thought. So I am all for fibbing to not look like an idiot.
You see you missed an wonderful opportunity to teach OUR culture.
You should have told them what age you were and then noted that even though you may be young there is this thing in America called authority and since you have the degree and you have the position as teacher you have the power and that was all there was to it. If they did not like it they could lump it.
Heheheheeehee
Fautie Hill
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